Dealing with Anger: 9 Temper Taming Tips

Dealing with anger is a difficult task because anger is a very strong and dangerous emotion. Learning how to deal with anger is one strength that is often perceived to be a weakness. You can deal with anger with various anger management exercises. It is not all myths, they work. All by yourself, it may be difficult to figure out how to deal with anger and frustration, therefore, seek help. These anger outbursts can also be present and break key relationships. Keep reading to discover nine temper taming tips.

  1. Deep breathes

Breathing is so relieving you can’t imagine. A lot of emotions can be overwhelming and can sometimes make us feel like we are suffocating, the only remedy is to breathe. Anger is a very strong emotion, one that causes great damage. When you’re angry your heart rate increases, and your muscles become tense, you can never tell what you might do or say. Breathing with your diaphragm along with your chest has a calming effect. It relaxes you and your tensed muscles, allowing you to calm down. These deep breaths may be followed by calming phrases to yourself such as ‘It is okay’ or even ‘breathe’.

  1. Count

People are different, and anger is exhibited in different ways too. When angry, a lot of people react instantly, reflex actions if we can call it that. However, those reflex actions are neither healthy nor helpful for you. Once you recognise this problem in yourself, counting becomes an effective means of dealing with anger. Counting before you react buys you enough time to think and calm down. Counting is also very calming itself, with time you would get used to the process and not need to count. Values like that are learned, not in a day but eventually.

  1. Think before you speak

When you are angry it is it not uncommon to find that your thoughts are jumbled up in your head and making the right decision at that moment may not be possible, therefore, you must think before you speak. Before you can think, you will need to calm down, kill two birds with one stone. When you think you can fully access the needed parts of your knowledge and thoughts to respond in a better way that will not cause harm or more damage to the already damaged situation. Thoughtless speech can ruin years of bliss.

  1. Calm down, then express yourself.

Sometimes an immediate flare-up of emotions may send the message in the most effective way, but it won’t be good for you and your wellbeing. Keeping the raised voices and harsh words at bay might be of help. For someone who needs to express his/herself, it will be effective to calm down and do so. This will keep you from using a bad tone which can mar your message or intentions. Ensuring you are in a better frame of mind before expressing yourself will save you the stress of explaining that truly and sincerely you didn’t mean what you said like that.

  1. Can’t express yourself to the cause? Write to release the energy.

Some people hold their anger in. They never let it escape so they bottle it up till they explode. Some people never explode, they sink instead. Bottling up emotions is very bad for your overall health; hence, they should be expressed from time to time via various means. For those who fail to express themselves towards the cause of their anger, releasing the energy elsewhere can be of help. You can write, sing, rap, dance, play sports anything constructive to release the negative energy that is anger.

  1. Walk away

He who runs away lives to fight another day. Walking away may seem like a silly tip to tame a bad temper but it saves you from horrible actions and words. Rather than let things possibly get aggravated walk away. Walking away is a coping mechanism that allows you to deal better with anger. When a situation fuels anger its best to leave the situation by walking away from it. if a group of people make you angry, walk away from them, if a conversation upsets you, walk away from it. However, do not make walking away from your default action. Walking away sometimes gives you the time and space to manage your temper to better respond when you find yourself in a similar situation in the near future.

  1. Consider other interpretations.

This particular tip tackles the determinants of anger in terms of intentions. Sometimes intentions are what causes you to get angry. If it wasn’t intentional you wouldn’t flinch, but it was, all hell would break loose. At times, it is unclear whether or not what got you angry was intentional or unintentional, therefore, you let anger consume you. In times like these, it here is a helpful tip when dealing with anger. Consider interpretations, as opposed to “He did this to me”, think “it may not have been intentional, but this happened”. This will keep the anger at bay pending the time you can fully ascertain the intentions behind what happened. This will also allow you to accept the possibilities prior to confrontation thus controlling your anger.

  1. Ask for help

Anger is not a great feeling, it is a horrible emotion to not have control of especially when you have a very short temper. Some people are angered by triggers and others are just internally angry. It may seem like it is for no apparent reason, but there is something that needs to be unlocked to move forward. Anger is a damaging emotion that kills, therefore it is very key to ask for help. Once you recognise the fact that your anger or temper is a huge problem in your life, seek help. There is no shame in it. Dealing with anger takes more than a few personal tips in some people, it may require professional help through, therapy, medication and more. Do not be silent.

  1. Sleep

Sleep in this context does not mean that when you are angry to go straight to bed, no. Sleep deprivation is heavily associated with impulse control because it diminishes the activity of the frontal lobe. A lack of sleep can create a highly irritable person which makes then feel angrier than they would about things or situations. In this case, it is important to take care of your pre-provocation state. The events leading up to anger can intensify or ease those emotions hence, sleep comes in handy. When you’re asleep you are able to relax, rejuvenate and the necessary fluids flow through your brain.

Anuoluwapo Agboke

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Anuoluwapo Agboke

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